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Tuesday, October 14, 2014

What about right now?


Why do we hide our scars? Why do we cover them with dense smiles and shallow pleasantries? Why do we lie awake at night recounting everything we could've done differently and planning for things that may never happen? It seems like our lives are so caught up in the turmoil of our past and declarations for our future that we forget about the present. Are we actually living our lives? Are we pausing to look around us and take in those moments for what they are? It seems we spend our days planning for tomorrow and trying to correct the mistakes of the day before. Could it be this is where happiness is truly found?

You know how easy it is to overlook something when you're looking for it? People say you'll find it when you stop looking. Well maybe we should stop spending our day rehashing the past or worrying about the future. Maybe we should wake up everyday and commit to living it as if it were our last. It could very well be our last. We are never promised tomorrow. If we could only apply that same faithfulness to other areas of our life. We expect to wake up in the morning. When we sit down for dinner we expect the chair to hold us. When we climb out of bed we expect the floor to be there beneath our feet as we stand. Why can we not expect favor and blessing tomorrow? Why can we not expect tomorrow to be the day we meet the love of our life or finally get that breakthrough we have been praying for?

Some people will argue that those things are constant and never failing. They're backed by logic and science. How often have you overslept the next morning?  How often have you sat on furniture that was broken and it gave with you? How often have you lost your balance when you stood up and fell? These are just occasional mishaps you say? You're exactly right yet you still hang on to the faith in these things. Life is the same way so you have no excuse. We get knocked down. We hurt. We are wronged. We wrong others. We make mistakes. We move on. We grow. We learn. Therefore enjoy today for everything it brings because tomorrow will bring an agenda all of its own.

 This is why I wear my heart on my sleeve. This is why I share who I am. I put myself out there because I want to be remembered for who I am. I am that southern girl full of gumption who knew to feel great love you have to risk it all. You can play on the safe side if you wish but you're just surviving you aren't really living. I've been taking chances lately and I've been knocked down almost every time but it makes me stronger. I could focus on negative and claim that I can't trust anyone. I could shut people out because of deception. I could keep my thoughts to myself. I would never feel butterflies. I would never wake up with hope of a phone call. I would never lose sleep just to text for hours. I would never dance in the kitchen because I'm smitten. I would never learn things about people that I may never have know otherwise. I may never feel the sting of a broken heart just to feel it heal again. I am living my life. Maybe we could all find what we are looking for if we stop hiding those scars and let someone love us.